Well, if this doesn’t cheer up your day nothing ever will, even if you are American and hate Brit humor.

The guy behind the counter is a fruit coach, specializing in digital fruits. I guess that is the best way to describe him. given the proliferating niches in coaching arena.

I had this dream last night.

I dreamed that i was coaching someone in my teleclass.  It was a woman who had coached me in a previous class and i guess i wasn’t particularly co-operative as a client. Now, it was her opportunity.

‘What seems to be the problem today, Julie?’ i ventured in the manner of bespoke coaches.

‘Nothing really. Nothing you can me help with anyway.’  she said, much in the way of my wife.

I couldn’t give up in front of twenty people glued to their headphones, listening in with vicarious enjoyment, hoping that i would soon trip. No way.

‘Let’s not give up so easily’ , i rushed on before she walked out on me, ‘let’s see, what was your first feeling as you woke up this morning?’

‘Don’t even remind me. I wanted to kill that damn dog.’ she growled.

‘What dog, why?  You seem like a dog lover.’ i ventured.

‘What do you know of me, anyway?’ she growled again, ‘It’s my neighbor’s dog. It’s been barking the whole night for the last few nights. I haven’t slept a wink.’

I thought of telling her about the dog that didn’t bark leading Sherlock Holmes to the killer in ‘The Hound of the Baskervilles‘, but thought better of it. Given her mood not the best time to talk about crimes and killers.

‘Is it a he dog or a she dog?’ i enquired tentatively.

‘Does it matter?’  she was shrill now, ‘I have been without sleep for days and you ask me this. How would that help?’

How would I know? I was told to listen and ask powerful questions, and that is what i was doing.

‘Ok, How about this?’, I asked, ‘How would killing the dog help? They may put you in jail and the guy may buy another dog.’

‘Yes, I agree’ she said for once, ‘guys actually, two guys living together. Earn a lot, bought this trophy dog and probably don’t have time to feed it.’

‘Ok, listen’  i offered inspired, ‘let us look at it this way. Are you looking for an external solution or an internal one?’

‘What do you mean internal solution?’ her voice rose again, ‘you think i am hallucinating?’

‘Oh,no, no, not at all’  i was highly re-conciliatory, ‘let us look at external ones then. What would you want to do other than killing the dog. Can’t you do something neighborly?’

‘Well’ she said, ‘i don’t dislike dogs. Perhaps i can feed it once a day. But, then it may not be hunger. May be they are feeding it too much. May be it’s lovesick. How would i know? I am not a dog whisperer!’ But she seemed to be thinking now, not all that hostile. This coaching thing is good, bro.

Nor was i to be honest. ‘I know, but once you get to know the dog you would get to know right?’ i was talking a chance, but what the heck, life is not worth living without taking risks, even it was in dream coaching.

‘Ok, you seem to be OK, you know’  Julie said, ‘never thought of befriending the dog. May give me something to do. You know i get so lonely.’

Well, coming from her that was high praise and i preened. I stopped just in time. Ye Gods, i don’t want to get into this I am lonely bit, i said to myself, be careful buddy.

‘Yeah’ i tried to sound bright, ‘ these guys, your neighbors, may be really cool guys. Getting to know the dog is getting to know the owner right. That would make you much less lonely.’

‘Didn’t you hear me?’ her voice rose again, ‘they are a couple. What will i do with them?  Perhaps getting to know a guy like you better may make me feel less lonely?’

I woke up instantly. When you are in serious danger in a dream, you instantly wake up. That’s why no one has been mauled by a lion in a dream.

I was perspiring. That was a near escape. I guess Julie had not read the ICF Ethics manual carefully, about relating to a Coach.The morning seemed so bright now!

Need to check with ICA whether this would count for my coaching hours.