In his twenty-second principle, Thomas J Leonard says: Become an unconditionally constructive person.
Coaching at its essence is a co-creative process. Coaching is a constructive and positive process, where the coach and the client journey together, learning together, supporting each other.
This journey depends how they acknowledge each other. The client having sought the coach out would have the natural tendency to defer to the coach. The coach has the responsibility to acknowledge the client and his achievements as they journey. This is the first step of a process that builds the relationship.
We all like to be liked. We all like to be appreciated and acknowledged.
Whether we meet a person face to face or we are in remote conversation, there are several opportunities to notice and acknowledge the person we deal with. It may be the appearance, it may be the grooming, it may be the tone of voice or it may be one of many things we can always find to praise and compliment the other upon.
Watch the Japanese greet a person, a friend or a stranger. They always bow down deep, expressing deep respect and warmly greet one another. If a stranger, they hand over a card with both hands,a gain bowing down. When they receive a card, they receive it with both hands, bowing down. They then look at it carefully before they put it away.
Each action is deliberate. Each action is designed for respect.
In most other parts of the world, the handing over and receiving a card is perfunctory. We barely glance at the card unless the person is important. The respect given to the other person is conditional upon the person’s status, and what that person can do for us.
Co-creation is about genuine respect to the person we deal with, irrespective of that person’s relative importance. power and wealth. It is an acknowledgment of another human, relating to that person in inner energy terms. This is when learning happens. This is how our energy spreads.
A coach always co-creates with the client without conditions and without judgment.